 I was going to call this one "No blasters! No blasters!" but it didn't make much sense, and two Star Wars titles in a row is too much for even a gigantic nerd like me to stomach. Not that the current title is all that great...fuck it.
Anyway, whilst eating lunch with my pal B. Larsen* he mentioned the quintessential programming language shoot-out, which I had not seen in quite some time, and is worth taking a look at if you haven't seen it in a while. It includes many hip new languages like Erlang and Ruby, and is quite detailed in how the languages are benchmarked.
Among the most interesting pieces of information are the outliers. Everyone knows C is fast. But Haskell (a favorite of Larsen's) and Steel Bank Common Lisp (my langue de plume) both are much faster than I might have guessed. And look at Ruby and PHP! Ruby is 54 times slower than C!** All this definitely makes for some interesting discussion. One cannot help but wonder why so many startups seem to favor such slow languages...
* His blog will likely never be updated again. November! Unbelievable.
** Yes, I know Ruby 2.0 will be much, much faster. Even so, a great deal of web startups use Ruby NOW. I question their judgment.
So once again I take up the task of laying down some of my thoughts about the whole world, and why it kind of sucks, and why some parts of it are awesome. It is kind of an exercise in vanity to assume anyone is reading this, but I kind of enjoy going back and re-reading my ridiculous shit, especially the parts of it that almost made sense.
So what made me decide to start blathering on again? Unless you live under a rock which doesn't happen to get cable, newspapers, or radio, we are in some trouble. People are screaming their heads off about the end of the financial world as we know it, and some of it actually seems to have less than the usual amount of hyperbole.
But who cares? Programmers should. Yahoo! is not, nor has been for quite some time, a front runner for web searches. Their day in the sun passed a while back. But a 700-person layoff at a major tech company is a bad indicator for programmers in general. One can't help but wonder if the mini-bubble driven by Google's insanely high stock price might collapse under the weight of such dire financial news. If this happens, VC for web startups may evaporate.
However, since no one can predict the future, people are going to soldier on relentlessly with their startups. Really, there is little else to do. The odds are against success all along, what could a little recession do to the odds that would make them any worse?
EDIT: Looks like I'm not the only one curious about the recession's effects: http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=101703
 There are certain computer programming languages now in use that attract a weird following. Ruby has become a really fanatic-attracting language to the point where if I meet any Ruby developers at a party I just sort of edge away from them assuring them that I know exactly how awesome Ruby is and that I sacrifice a goat to Yukihiro Matsumoto every night, screaming and gibbering snippets of Ruby code while I slay the beast.
As weird and clique-y as they are, they always seemed kind of sane compared to the Rails people I met. For those of you unfamiliar with this term, I congratulate you. You are probably doing something important. Even if you aren't, it's still sort of pleasing to me that you aren't familiar with this buzzword-laden nightmare, much less one of these deranged individuals trying to tell me that my CS degree was worthless, and that I should have focused in "business science" with a minor in "information." *
Now, I would like to start a startup. And while that means taking a certain amount of good natured ribbing about Web 2.0, I am kind of tired of people assuming I am tasteless enough to use this shitheap. And now I have been vindicated by an unlikely source: a leader of the Rails community!
Or an ex-leader, I guess. It's always kind of cool when someone fairly well-respected by a large group loses his shit and denounces his following. Zed Shaw is the Jim Jones of Railstown.
I look forward to reading his updates, and so should you. Another voice is added to my choir of profane blogs I check from work every day!
* Actual quote from Rails-jockey I met in Boston once upon a time.
I'm in Boston at The Spotted Apron, which is a fairly snazzy bakery near Audrey's apartment that caters to people with laptops by having approximately eleventy billion outlets to plug into. Whether they designed it this way or it was just a happy accident is up for debate, but my guess is they realized they would have a ton of people kicking around with laptops, and nothing draws laptop people more than sweet, sweet alternating current. And the longer they stay, the more they drink coffee and purchase cupcakes. Truly a perfect business model.
So I began to wonder today why I feel so glum about working for large companies. It doesn't necessarily follow that large companies make people sad, and they didn't always make me sad. But something about the thought of working for a huge company (let's say more than 50 people) sort of gnaws at me now.
Back when I first started programming, I figured I would work as a cog in a huge company, which is pretty much what my father does. It looked lucrative to me when I was younger, and by all accounts it is. And although it may be somewhat uninteresting programming, even uninteresting programming is preferable to, say, bagging groceries. Plus, even at a young age I knew computers were going to be my life. They fascinated me beyond anything else the world had to offer. And back then, the only way I knew how to work on them was to work for a big company, like Dad.
Flash forward to age 23. I realize my programming skill has allowed me to pursue my own activities in whatever language I want. I further realized that I wanted to be my own boss. And after many a drunken bull session, a plan was made: to make something new that people would like.
But why is it that I want to do this? Is it the money? Maybe. I can make a fine living continuing to work for a large company. But I will never have sizable equity stake in anything unless I go my own way. Is it the challenge? Perhaps. Making my own company work would be far harder than anything I could possibly experience working for a big company. But it would also be far and away more rewarding to succeed.
So we come to the real reason I am striking out on my own: I want to do something new. I want to be the first to do something. And I want to help the world at large somehow. What I am working on right now (with my co-founder) will not make the world better. But if it becomes successful, I will have enough money to do something worthwhile. Something to change the lives of people who need help. That is the ultimate goal -- to be achieved through a mix of naive optimism and disillusionment.
 'Cause I'll throw you off the line. I'll break you and destroy you, given time.
This site is turning into all OLPC news all the time. But I can't help it if it seems to stay in the limelight.
These fuckers think they can run roughshod over OLPC! First Microsoft attempts to re-design Windows to fit on the ultralight and ultra-hot OLPC XO, and realizes it for the fool's errand it is. My guess is someone finally told the boss MISSION IMFUCKINGPOSSIBLE in no uncertain terms. Such as, you know, yelling "MISSION IMFUCKINGPOSSIBLE" right in their face.
But wait, there's more! Microsoft, showing audacity levels never before seen, has asked OLPC to help them. "Can you redesign the whole fucking thing so we can play, too?"
If Negroponte has any stones whatsoever, and I bet he does, he will send back this message: "Nuts!"
Apologies for this profane rant. It has been tagged accordingly.
 As promised, a book review. Technobabble will resume tomorrow.
The book Leaving Microsoft to Change the World: An Entrepreneur's Odyssey to Educate the World's Children is by an interesting guy named John Wood, who, as you may be able to guess from the title, used to work at Microsoft, left, and founded an excellent charity concerning books. You can see how I might be biased towards such a piece, since it involves both of my favorite things to do, but I think it is a genuinely good piece of writing.
A word about how I came by the book. Normally, I have a stack of books five or six high to read, and when I was given this book was no exception. Nine times out of ten a book I have never heard of given to me as a gift will end up getting ignored, not because of any fault of the gift giver, but due to the fact that I keep finding stuff to read in the meantime, and never get around to my gift. However, the person who gave me this book means a great deal to me, and I respect her opinion immensely. So a book that otherwise might never have had a chance got bumped to the top of the list.
And what an amazing book! John Wood has a particularly conversational style of writing, which makes for excellent nonfiction. Subjects which may have been boring when broached by other authors are quite interesting when rendered in his style. Also, he liberally sprinkles the book with interesting asides, both about his time at Microsoft (he worked in China during the height of Microsoft's power, and even had some dealings with The Bill) and about his attempts to start a charity. His stories about raising funding ring especially true to me, and anyone else running a startup.
While I don't want to give away too much of the book, I will end my mini-review by saying how inspiring the book is to anyone wishing to leave a lasting legacy of good in the world. And thanks to Audrey Etlinger for finding it!
And in case anyone reading this has spare pocket change or is looking for a cool charity, look no further than the one the book is all about, Room To Read.
"But Sean! Where is the clever title? Where is the probably copyrighted image you add to make yourself seem oh-so-witty?"
Pipe down. I'll add a fully-fleshed article tomorrow morning, maybe. I have been busier than hell with school stuff, company stuff, and personal stuff. Attempts to take the suck out of my life have snagged the top priority on all my cores, to make an awful computer metaphor.
I break radio silence only to let you know of the stuff going on with the OLPC.
Pow!
Blam!
Future! I can smell it cooking down south. Man, that last sentence is gross!
Those who live outside the US may be wondering why people in the so-called First World are getting to use these (Pow! links to a story about Alabama kids using the OLPC in school.) While I could probably make a pretty funny joke about Alabama being a howling maw of poverty, the question is just. What the fuck, Negroponte? I mean, yeah, great, spread the love. But the spread the love in places the love is needed. Kids in Alabama are not in desperate need of these things. It seems they won't even be used to their capacity -- just as some half-assed teaching aid. The kids have to give them back at the end of the year!
The program I envisioned when I heard about this was something GIVEN to children unable to acquire these resources any other way. I'm pretty sure those kids in Alabama have a library with computers, or probably even a computer lab in a nearby school or even one in their own elementary school. I envisioned a tool that a child could make into any other tool they needed or wanted. A cornucopia machine the kids could use in any way they wanted, to program anything they wished. I am more than a little disgusted that some are going to the US as a charitable donation to a SCHOOL, not actual individuals.
Oh well, enough whining. At least the vast majority are going someplace useful. Enough bitching from me for now.
Watch tomorrow for a review of a book named Leaving Microsoft to Change The World that someone amazing gave me.
 I decided I should probably give it a rest with the puns in the article titles. A literary allusion is a nice title, though. We do things with class around here, shitheads!
But on to the content. As you may have gathered from my many posts which either center on Hacker News or mention it in passing, I am a big fan of the site. During my usual meanderings and daydreamings about how awesome a pet dinosaur* would be and why it might not be too late for me to become an astronaut, I devoted some time to thinking about why I liked it so much. It is, in case you are foolish enough to never click the orange text when reading my missives, a site run by Paul Graham concerning startups and other variegated things hackers like. It began as a sort of offshoot of the Y Combinator startup program, which allots small investments to promising startups in batch mode every summer and winter, both in Boston and San Franciso, respectively. Paul runs this as well, and has made a point to let people interested in funding know that registration on Hacker News is mandatory, and indeed, the quality of your comments and contributions has a direct effect on whether or not you will be funded.
This revelation has created an interesting culture, one that I wish existed in more places on the web, and that I will discuss in depth in a minute. However, 99% of the forums online have no real interest in authentication of the poster's identity. In fact, most forums rather expect you to come up with a username to protect your real identity. But why?
The most common answer is protection from identity theft. But these days, what can someone do with just your name? Track you down? Unless you have a very uncommon name, it seems unlikely. There are probably hundreds of Sean Spencers out there;** can someone really find my physical location without sifting through all these? And why would they want to, unless I pissed someone off?
And here we come to a well-established point: the internet + anonymity makes you an asshole. When their is no penalty to your reputation for being a jackass (since no one can connect up your online username with your real name), people will just degenerate into stupid, vicious animals.
This is the difference between the discussions on Hacker News and those elsewhere. Due to most posters on Hacker News having an established identity (many posters use their real names, like myself), the discussion quality is incredible. People are literally climbing over each other to submit interesting stories and write insightful commentary. This is why Hacker News is now my homepage, and why I wish more sites would adopt a similar policy of authentic identities.
* I am thinking maybe a stegosaurus. I mean, I would need a bigger yard, but nothing beats riding around on a stegosaurus.
** Lots of athletes, it seems. If you find an athletic Sean Spencer online, it is a very safe bet that it isn't me.
 Wait, that's AIDS. Never mind. Though annoying, ads are generally pretty harmless. While reading Hacker News a while ago I began thinking about whether ads should exist on this stupid blog. After several cups of coffee and some wasted thought imagining Scarlett Johansson nude, I finally came up with a solution: targeted ads. Enter Adpinion, an interesting idea with excellent implementation.
I like to support startups whenever possible, and the idea of Adpinion is worth supporting. The basis of this innovation is that ads work best when they involve something a person cares about. Tailoring ads to individual viewers is difficult for a site without cookies, but Adpinion not only allows me to see what various visitors of my site like, but also allows repeat visitors to view more relevant ads.
So how does this magical mystery work? Adpinion uses a very simple and tried-and-true method: voting. If it serves an ad you dislike, click the thumbs down. The ad will disappear until the page is refreshed and the site serves a new ad for you to vote on. If you like the ad, click the thumbs up. You'll see more like it in the future.
I decided to apply for a beta invitation, got it a few weeks later, and decided to try it out last week. It will be interesting to see what (if anything) people vote up and down.
And I just put that picture of Scarlett up there to aid in my ruminations of her nude body while I wrote this.
For the few people actually reading this goofy crap (Hi Mom) I decided to write down some of what I have been thinking about the Kindle, which every other blogger on the planet seems to be pissing themselves in either spasmodic glee or rage about.
Frequent readers (or people who, you know, actually KNOW me) are aware of the fact that I read books like they are going out of style. I took four* books out of the library here on Saturday and I am done with two.** And it was a busy weekend without much time to read. Though I am a well known skimmer, I truly love reading books.
I also like programming. And technology, and computers, and all kinds of things other programmers and technophiles enjoy. This includes little gadgety handheld things, though I rarely buy them. I actually only own an iPod due to my clumsy attempts to flirt with the girl selling raffle tickets leading me to buying a ticket with my coffee money for that day.
This combination of the love of gadgets and books ought to make me uniquely biased towards the Kindle, but you know what? I seriously could care less about the thing. While it has some features that I like (E-Ink, the ability to read non-Amazon text files easily), it also has a slew of features that piss me off to no end.
1) It looks fugly. Yeah, yeah, looks don't matter, only functionality. Grow up. If it looks like asshole, I don't want my hands on it.
2) DRM. Wait, what? You mean I can't lend other people my Amazon eBooks bought through my Kindle? Well fuck you too, Bezos. If you are so petrified of BOOK PIRACY(!) then just build in a month-long time limit before the book I lent to my friend evaporates from my friend's Kindle.
3) Orwell's worst nightmare comes true. Peruse this chilling passage from the Kindle's Terms of Service:
The Device Software will provide Amazon with data about your Device and its interaction with the Service (such as available memory, up-time, log files and signal strength) and information related to the content on your Device and your use of it (such as automatic bookmarking of the last page read and content deletions from the Device). Annotations, bookmarks, notes, highlights, or similar markings you make in your Device are backed up through the Service. - Amazon, Kindle Terms of Service.
Publishers' marketing research must just be tossing Bezo's salad all night long over that one. Nothing like intensely close scrutiny of one's reading habits! It's bad enough that Amazon itself tracks so much information when people use its site, but tracking such things as bookmarks and deletions is completely intolerable. I can see it sending out police patrols to arrest me for pedophilia after reading Lolita one too many times.
So, needless to say, I will be passing on this loathsome hunk of shit. However, OLPC has your back for all your nerd holiday shopping needs. The XO is on sale through the 31st of December! Now THERE is something that should be setting the blogosphere*** aflame, but everyone is too busy jerking off all over the Kindle.
* Rainbow's End by Vernor Vinge, A Fire Upon the Deep by Vernor Vinge, The Confusion by Neal Stephenson, and Atonement by Ian McEwan in case anyone cares.
** Both Vinge books. I hope he keeps writing; his space operas are amazing in depth and vision, and the postcyberpunk stuff like Rainbow's End is equally excellent.
*** Kill me now.
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